Chester Bennington

News have travelled the internet quickly and the note of Linkin Parks front singers suicide hit me like a truck. Through a Tweet.

Linkin Park were one of the first bands I could basically quote music from in my teenage years and probably one of the reasons why I learned English a lot quicker than I usually would have. To really understand and appreciate their lyrics.

I knew from some interviews that apparently a lot of the songs he wrote for the band were rooted in his nightmares and the times where he felt a lot like shit.

I thought

Hey, they’ve made it. They went way more pop and electronic, a lot of people didn’t like it, but that’s fine by them. They just do what they want. They’ve made it.

It’s not the true though, the road back to depression or into addiction or what ever really crappy things are eating away at you, is always short. You’ve never made it. For me his death is a giant reminder of that.

Right now, I can’t remember the last time I cried, but the news of his death brought me close to tears. Chester and the rest of the band are really like childhood heroes for me. A German newspaper called him The one that screamed for our generation when we wanted to, but couldn’t, everybody that was a misfit or overwhelmed with something.

I can’t hold on
(To what I want when I’m stretched so thin)
It’s all too much to take in
I can’t hold on
(To anything watching everything spin)
With thoughts of failure sinking in

By Myself

I want to be in another place
I hate when you say you don’t understand
(You’ll see it’s not meant to be)
I want to be in the energy, not with the enemy
A place for my head
You try to take the best of me
Go away

A Place For My Head

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